Hooked
I never planned for this to happen. I never could have dreamed someone like you would ever look my way. I never imagined liking you the way I do. And I never thought of someone like you liking me too. You started off as just an acquaintance. Yes, I thought you were extremely good looking but I never thought twice about you. Consumed with feelings for someone else I just thought you were going to be a person I ran into a couple of times but nothing would ever develop.
Oh but feelings developed. From the moment I ran into you at the Rec center and we started talking, it was like my whole world was being turned upside down. You gave me your number and from then on the feelings kept growing. I tried not to let them get hold of my heart because I can’t take another upset, but they did.
It’s funny because I always fear the worst, because that is what I have come to expect from guys. Most of the time I’m the one interested and the feelings only go one way. But this time it’s different. The feelings are there and growing stronger, my mind is constantly running around trying to figure you out, and no matter how much I doubt you are going to deliver… you always do.
You came and watched the Vikings game with me, and let me lay on you (I don’t do that unless I am completely comfortable with someone). Friday you picked me up from work and helped me with my car, along with helping me take out the trash at work. Saturday you remembered to text me about where you were sitting and then came and sat with me until I had to leave. Sunday I asked you to come to my soccer game and even though you missed the game you still showed up (you even showed up with Gus Gus) and we sat in your car and talked for about 20 minutes. Monday, I had not planned on seeing you but when I went to plyometrics you were there and afterward we went and got a smoothie and again you helped me take out the trash.
Tuesday, again I had not planned on running into you and yet once again I did, when I walked into the Rec Center office you were there. You saw that I walked in with Ian and gave him the “double-take” and asked me what I was doing. I told you I was waiting for a friend to go workout with and you said you had to go make a call, but it was like you didn’t want to leave because I might be with Ian. As I sat waiting for Annalee I could see you keeping tabs on me. Then as I was waiting for Annalee to get changed you walked to the bathroom and once you came out you tried not to stare at me but you did and I saw you. Then I asked you were you were going and I asked you to come here, you said you were at work so I just asked for a hug. The way you said, “Yeah”, was like I was dumb for asking if I could have a hug. Your eyes piercing blue in a way I could only ever dream looked at me in a way that is indescribable. The way you hugged me and then asked me about my day really makes my whole world complete.
I don’t know if you like me. Heck I don’t even know what’s going on between us, but I do know that I have to talk to you. I have to be honest and let you know how I feel because if I don’t I am going to keep wondering and keep over thinking and right now with everything going on, I just can’t let this play out. I mean maybe I can but it’s going to take a lot of work not to get wrapped up in you. I’m so concerned with how this has no chance of making it that I can’t just go with whatever. I can’t trust my gut because my gut has always been wrong or lead my astray. I trust you because I know you are not the type of guy to lead a girl on, but something holds me back because I have this fear that I don’t deserve someone as good as you. That there is NO WAY someone like you could like me.
I guess we’ll just have to keep our fingers crossed on this one…
